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THE CONFLUENCERS

The Story Others Want To Hear

Sunday, August 18, 2024

The Story Others Want To Hear

As I stepped into that overheated conference room and scanned a maze of hundreds of non-profit stands, I noticed many were advertising the same picture perfect checklist of outcomes and buzzwords funders tend to like – “livelihoods, climate change, education etc”

It was winter in Delhi and I could feel that deep cold in my bones thaw “Everyone looks the same, like they do the same work. That’s impossible”. I blinked.

If you've subscribed to my email list here, you’ll know that I did a 360 on my career, moved to India in search of a job in the non-profit sector which I failed to find. And eventually decided to set up a non-profit consulting company - The Confluencers - instead.
That year gave me the ride of my life.

I had to wrap my head around how to start a consulting business from zero. I invested 1000s of pounds I didn't have to seek help from mentors that had been where I'd been and knew the steps to take.
I had wanted to show everyone - non-profits, my husband, my parents, my old boss - that my new mission deserved to exist and could pay our bills.

But instead, our planned return to London came all too soon and I was running out of steam.

It felt like I’d spent every day shouting off rooftops about the cure to non-profit cancer in a language no one could understand.
“You know how many funders prefer to give restricted funding?” I’d ask

“And how this means non-profits can’t feel financially secure or cover their core costs?” I’d continue.

“Well, I can fix that! Do you want to hear how?!?!"

And then I would spray away grenades of “technobabble” (as one of my mentors Russell Brunson would say).
I'd spew out all the information I had about WHAT problems I was going to solve; forgetting to give anyone even one tiny reason WHY they should listen to me.

I had 75 pages of proof that everyone wanted the problem I solved gone, but when I talked about it no one seemed to care.

My words were not landing and as Lisa Nichols would say “You are responsible for how your words land”.

Problem was, I had no clue what I was doing wrong or what to change.

Until that day at the conference. As I probed and asked non-profit leaders at the stands for more details on the parts I was interested in - their story, their dreams and struggles - I realised what was happening.

There were TWO parallel stories.
The story we plaster on billboards to mirror what we think others want to hear.

( For non-profits at that conference that story was that picture perfect checklist of outcomes – “livelihoods, climate change, education etc”. Impossible to stand out with that one!)

And then there was the real, honest, rough, imperfect behind the scenes story no one was telling.

The quirks of how the founder started the organisation, the unique approach they had discovered, the mistakes they’d learnt from and their real dreams of what they felt was needed most.
That deeper, moving story was held under lock and key for the few that took the time to listen.
Problem was, most people - including busy wealthy philanthropists - don’t always have the patience to listen UNLESS we give them a reason to.
This meant there was a growing knowledge gap between what non-profits actually do (in the real world) and what funders think they do and need.
Many non-profits are not bridging that gap.

And it is costing them funders' attention.

I was making the same mistake in my consultancy work.

I was like a waiter, dumping a 20 page menu in another language on the table with an attitude saying “you choose”.
When I could have been the waiter asking a customer for their preferences and making a thoughtful recommendation to them.

What I learnt was that expecting others to sort through information we provide is unrealistic and instead it's better to proactively select what information we think is useful and only share that in bite-sized pieces.

So that’s how I started answering the question that had been buzzing in my head: "Why are impactful non-profits not getting funded?"

It was because we weren't telling the full story and that story was essential to funders understanding non-profits' value and funding them.

"Underfunded because undervalued" as one leader aptly described it.
Truly.
So where does that leave us?

I think it leaves us with a choice.
What story do we tell: the "safer" one we think others want to hear or the one that is bursting out of us, but might require us to put more skin in the game to tell?

I've shifted the focus of my work on learning how to tell the latter - non-profits real full impact story. And if you are reading this and on the fence, I want to invite you to choose to do the same.
The sector and funders and philanthropists out there need to hear the truth from you. The hurdles you overcome every day, the details and nuances of your work that seem obvious to you but are actually marvelous and hugely creative.
Understanding each other better is the only way to bring our two factions - grant givers and grant receivers closer together.

I truly believe that bridging this gap and increasing the perceived value of non-profits' and the social sector's contribution to society, is also the only way for it to get the funding it desperately needs.
The world needs to see and learn from your journey, I hope you'll find the courage to share it.
So now that you’ve heard my storytelling challenges, tell us, what are yours?

Which of the two stories do you tell? Have you found the words to explain your work? Or are there parts that are still tricky to explain?

​I always love to explore different approaches to storytelling, so please feel free to reach out or share your thoughts below. I'd truly love to hear them.

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Hi, I Am Anna Bruni Sabhaney

Founder Of The Confluencers

I believe non-profit missions deserve to be funded through flexible trust based funding and that to do that we need to shift power dynamics in Philanthropy. Here you will see me share ideas and experiences I have developed so far to make this happen.